Chart Review: 29th March 2024
Making sense of a nation’s musical tastes
It’s a bumper week for new or newish stuff in the charts - a bonafide Easter miracle! Starting with a trio of re-entries, at (40) we’ve got The Blessed Madonna featuring Clementine Douglas with “Happier”. With my standard caveat that I know so little about dance music, this feels pretty ordinary to me with the odd flourish that really wakes the song up for a moment - little ascending runs into the chorus, sudden blares of brash synths.
Jungle are back at (32) with “Back On 74”. I read a snippy description of them having named themselves after one of the UK’s most forward thinking and interesting genres but making some of the most uninspired pap around. While that’s a bit mean, there’s something to it. This is about as safe as much gets, neo-soul played without any edge or bite. The lush harmonies are nice but we all know that kind of thing sounds nice; there are no risks taken here. It’s inoffensive; I don’t hate it by any means but the track hardly bursts with ideas.
Then at (30) we’ve got Rudimental and Skepsis featuring Charlotte Plank and Riko Dan (most of whom could be made up for all I know) with “Green & Gold”. I’d absolutely have put Rudimental in the above bracket, but I quite like this one. The chorus is decent, the skittering beat is nothing new but it’s produced with a lot of thump, and the rap verse, presumably by Riko Dan, is nicely done. It feels like a nicely old school set up that will always work - DJs with production values, pop singer, rapper - simple, effective stuff.
The new stuff is an interesting selection for sure. British producer Artemas is at (13) with “I Like The Way You Kiss Me”. This is a cool slice of goth-pop that aims for sexy, lusty vibes and mostly succeeds on that front. The beat is especially effective - it’s insistent and unchanging, at a perfect heart racing pace. According to Artemas’ Wiki bio, he was first inspired to write songs by Kurt Cobain and has the look to match; I notice this song has three additional songwriters and the fairly crass lyrics don’t feel as though they’d meet the approval of the late grunge star, so I wonder if he’s being steered to some extent. Still, not half bad.
The big move-makers of the week are Future and Metro Boomin, who have three tracks in the top 40 off the back of a new album. I don’t think this is for me, necessarily. “Type Shit” (18) has a good beat, all moody and ominous, but it’s the kind of mumble rap I’ve never got on board with. The same goes for “Cinderella” (20), again a quality beat but the performances don’t hit a chord for me. The Kendrick Lamar-featuring “Like That” (6) has a nicely interpolated Barry White sample (by way of its use in a Rodney O & Joe Cooley track) and Future ups his clarity a little. Kendrick’s verse isn’t one of his best; it’s dull, dull stuff to harp on about enunciation in hip hop but the way some of these whippersnappers deliver their bars does leave me cold. I know it’s a me problem because this album seems to have been received very well.
Hozier returns with a track called “Too Sweet” (7) which I’m afraid is simply laughable stuff. There’s a fun subgenre of tracks by basically milquetoast, mild mannered musicians making tracks about how tough they are and accordingly how their partner is just too boring for them, and Irish bellower Hozier is one of the most egregious examples to date. “I’ll take my whiskey neat / my coffee black and my bed at three” goes the chorus. There’s nothing more dangerous than eschewing milk. Dreadful stuff, but at least he keeps the shouting to a minimum.
Saving the best for last - two tracks off the deluxe edition of Olivia Rodrigo’s Guts album have hit the charts. Landing highest is “Obsessed” at (10), a heavy ‘90s pop-rock cut putting Rodrigo in the role of a sort of stalker. It’s got genuinely nuanced lyrics and terrific production - I see it was co-written by Annie Clark which adds up given the tasteful maximalism on show. But it’s “So American” that caught my ear in particular. This one’s more straight ahead power-pop in the vein of Ric Ocasek. It’s no surprise to me that Rodrigo catches a pretty broad audience - aside from the massively catchy, bouncy tunes, she’s got a great voice but not a showy one. Listening to Ariana Grande trill and peacock, it’s not nearly so inviting.
Beyonce’s at (3) still with “Texas Hold ‘Em”, but with Cowboy Carter having dropped, one would assume next week’s chart will be overrun with several of its 27 tracks. It’s good, that album, though so, so much too long. It’d be funny if one of the tracks with Willie Nelson mumbling away hit the top spot. Benson Boone’s at (1) again. Insert Didier Drogba “it’s a fucking disgrace” gif here.
Pick of the week: Olivia Rodrigo - “So American”
