Network PPV Reviews #005: Survivor Series 2000

Combing the WWE network one Pay Per View at a time

19/11/2000 - The 14th edition of WWE’s second oldest show comes from the Ice Palace in Tampa, Florida. The opening video is all about Triple H, who has recently been unveiled as the architect behind Rikishi’s vehicular assault of Stone Cold Steve Austin. This year-long saga is one of my strongest memories of childhood wrestling fandom. I remember the twin reveals of Rikishi as the assailant and HHH as the schemer both being very disappointing. Wrestling at large, though, was hot stuff, as evidenced by the wild crowd as we open up. Fans are popping off in the always-delightful looking WWE restaurant in New York too. 

T&A & Trish Stratus vs Crash and Molly Holly & Steve Blackman

Lawler, on co-comms with Jim Ross, leers grossly at Trish right from the jump. Crash Holly gets a good pop - he’s super likeable. I’m not sure how Blackman’s been roped into this. One fan has a very basic sign that just says “Steve Blackman”, which is apropos. Blackman starts things off with Albert. He outpaces the big man and tags Crash in. Crash is caught by Albert, but Blackman dropkicks his partner to down the baldie. Trish comes in and tries to boot Crash in the nuts, but he hops out of the way and she hits her partner instead. Molly enters, but Trish tags Test in. The tall Canadian looks around a bit. Crash comes in for some impressive athleticism before being crushed by a lovely big boot from Test. JR tells us that Crash is “not an elf”. 

The arena still looks pretty smoky thanks to the fireworks but the crowd comes alive when Molly and Trish come back in. Molly hits some elbows and chops before Trish yanks her down by the hair. While Blackman inadvertently distracts the ref, the big chaps hold Molly in place while Trish kicks her. Albert then picks Molly up and Test goes to the top rope with the intention of squishing her, which is a bit much. Trish beats Molly in the corner while the lads brawl on the outside. Eventually Molly nails a sunset flip for the three.

Verdict: 50% of the participants are pretty charismatic and several can work, too. That plus a good pace means this is entertaining enough stuff. **

Edge and Christian jaw with Kurt Angle. They make plans for later. Angle’s gimmick is great fun, an oblivious, obnoxious prig character. Tiger Ali Singh isn’t allowed backstage because he’s not on the list. D’lo Brown is there too. I like D’lo. That segment was nowt. 

Traditional Survivor Series Match: Road Dogg, K Kwik, Chyna, & Billy Gunn vs The Radicalz

I was surprised to see K-Kwik at this time. He looks precisely the same as he does now. He and Dogg spit some muffled bars over a rap metal beat. Chyna comes out with her firework gun. It says C-2000 on it. I assume the C stands for Chyna. The Radicalz enter as a unit. There’s a lot of tragedy in this match. I think the ref is Tim White, who’s also dead. 

Perry Saturn and Gunn start off, but the crowd becomes more interested when Chyna enters. “Remember when Eddie was in the shower with those two women, and he got busted?” says JR re. Guerrero’s relationship with Chyna. I’d assumed this would come down to Chyna vs Eddie, but as soon as the match initially breaks down, he smacks her in the back of the head and she’s out. Dogg comes in to slam Saturn a bit. Perry’s done all the work thus far. He hits a back suplex and gets Eddie in. Eddie’s the only one who can be bothered to play to the crowd. Eddie and Dean Malenko work Dogg’s knee. Gunn gets in, press slams Eddie and pins him. So that’s the two people the crowd were most interested in, gone in quick succession. 

K-Kwik gets in. He and Dean do some fun, fast paced stuff. Kwik’s got his working boots on and Malenko’s a great partner, as is Benoit, who pretty quickly hits a big bridging German suplex for the three. Could have watched more of that. Road Dogg returns and takes a pummelling before he fires out with a double clothesline. He works some nice forearms on Saturn, but Perry snags a northern lights suplex for the three. It’s just Gunn vs three Radicalz. The heels team up, Benoit dropping the rope so Gunn topples to the outside, but Gunn wriggles out of a double team with nice timing and hits the Fameasser on Malenko for the three. Saturn’s in like a shot to stomp away. Billy’s bodyslammed and hit with Benoit’s horrible diving headbutt. Billy kicks at two then tries to suplex Benoit from the apron. Perry trips him so that Benoit hands on Gunn in a pinning predicament and holds his leg down for the three. Nice finish! 

Verdict: A fun match that could have been even better given the personnel - really odd to get rid of Eddie and Chyna so early. **½ 

The Rock shows up and the crowd goes wild. He can’t be bothered talking to Lilian Garcia. Michael Cole with his frosted tips interviews Chris Jericho, who calls him “Mitchell”. Jericho’s off the back of his unfortunate WrestleMania 2000 booking where he was the third wheel in his own title defence and now feuding with Kane because he spilled some coffee on the big red bloke. He has some fun on the mic at least.

Chris Jericho vs Kane

The crowd loves Jericho. Kane’s not far off from his Royal Rumble 2001 performance, perhaps the best night in his career. Jericho tees off on Kane for a bit, but soon the future mayor gains control and batters Y2J in the corner. Jericho floats over Kane, kicks him to the outside, hits a nice baseball slide, then a tope goes horribly wrong. Kane slams Jericho off this and that. Jericho manages his springboard dropkick then boots the steps into his foe. Kane with a succession of power moves and chokes. “Anybody that’s normal looking, Kane doesn’t like,” says JR. Kane shrugs off Chris’ offence while Lawler blathers about Mr Potato Head. He removes a turnbuckle.

Nice selling from Jericho who pulls himself up desperately using Kane’s top. Another press slam on Y2J - that’s one per match so far. Kane goes up top but Jericho racks him. Kane manages to lob Jericho to the mat and goes for his top rope clothesline, but Jericho hits a dropkick. Jericho tries to build speed and eventually cinches in the Walls of Jericho, but we know Kane won’t tap out. Jericho drags Kane back to the middle and keeps the hold in for a long while. When Kane eventually powers out, Jericho hits the bulldog and goes for a Lionsault. Kane goozles the smaller man and hits the chokeslam for the three. 

Verdict: Not bad stuff, smartly booked with Jericho looking pretty strong in defeat. **½

Terri tells the Radicalz Triple H will meet them later and Benoit laughs evilly. Chilling stuff! 

European Championship - William Regal (c) vs Hardcore Holly

Now we’re talking. Regal’s the best (less interested in Hardcore Holly). He grabs the mic for some blather. He has a pop at the whole presidential election kerfuffle down in Florida. “What do you know about elections?” says JR, who presumably isn’t aware there are indeed elections in the UK. Bob Holly comes out to interrupt. He tries to pop the crowd but no one’s that interested because he’s Hardcore Holly.

Holly ducks Regal and stomps him in the corner, but Regal soon reverses and gears up some nice mat stuff. Arm drags from Holly. Lawyer labours to a joke about Dom Perignon being a mafia leader. Lawler makes some crap jokes about England. Regal works Holly’s arm. He sets the crowd off a bit with a little Royal wave. Regal’s right back on the arm. Holly fires up at long last. He hits a cross body and clotheslines with his good arm. Then he gets fed up and hits Regal with the belt for the DQ.

Verdict: Odd booking which doesn't do much for anyone, two pros putting on a psychologically sound match but by no means a thriller. **

Regal grimaces and gets out of there. Fun! Trish comes to see Kurt. Kurt talks some more nonsense. Trish offers her assistance and/or to have sex with Kurt, but Kurt’s oblivious, the dweeb!

A package about Rikishi copping to running down Stone Cold. This was such a weird thing to do. Rikishi was really popular so you can see why you’d push him, but the sudden heel turn made no sense, and him claiming he did it for The Rock became an instant meme. And then that idea - Samoan solidarity etc - was undercut by Triple H’s eventual unmasking as the chief schemer! Daft. 

Rikishi vs The Rock

Rikishi has his Bad Man theme. Someone holds up a sign that says “Rakishi reeks”, unfortunately spelling his name wrong. Rocky sprints to the ring and it’s on. He lays the smack down. Impressive air from a back drop on the enormous Rikishi. The ref won’t let Rock waffle his cousin with a chair. A Rikishi superkick downs the Brahma Bull. Rikishi hits leg drops on The Rock’s damaged chest. Shortly they go outside and Rock bashes Rikishi on the steps and the ring bell, which sadly doesn’t make a noise. Loads of fantastic shitheads in the crowd cannot stop shooting the middle finger(s) into the camera. An unusually good ref bump allows Rikishi to grab the sledgehammer, one of wrestling’s stupider weapons. He swings it like a bat and obviously doesn’t connect. A Rock Bottom leads to a cover, but the dazed ref counts slowly for a 2.5. 

Rikishi headbutts Rock’s chest and hits a cracking Samoan Drop then a Banzai Drop. Rock kicks at two. From the angle you can see him staring intently at the ref, which the old school lads always criticise today’s crop for. To my immense surprise, The Rock takes the Stinkface but explodes out the corner with a clothesline. A terrific, athletic bump from Rikishi. Rock struggles to his feet, spine buster, and sets up for the People’s Elbow. He’s selling very nicely. He does the People’s Elbow away from the hard cam, which doesn’t seem right to me. A lovely funny sell of the elbow from Rikishi and that’s the three. 

Verdict: Good fun that had the crowd the whole time, they didn’t do an immense amount but unsurprisingly the two made sure to make one another look good. Rikishi especially was surprisingly good. **½ 

Rikishi hits superkick after the match, then three Banzai drops. He hits a ref, goes to leave, then comes back in for a fourth. JR wonders if The Rock will ever be the same again. This is basically it for Rikishi’s main event run. They play his music. It always tickles me, the kayfabe of that. You’re celebrating him behaving terribly! 

Back to NYC to advertise JR’s cookbook and look at the stupid restaurant. Raven is there looking weird. He’s due to have his talents squandered by the company. Stone Cold arrives to, IMO, a smaller response than expected. Triple H hangs out with the Radicalz. Mick Foley enters to tell them off. He bans the Radicalz from ringside but then reminds us it’s a no DQ match, so it’s unclear what the consequences would be. 

Women’s Championship - Ivory (c) vs Lita

Ivory’s in Right To Censor and has their annoying music. Lita gets a great pop but she’s not entirely sure what she’s doing with herself on the way to the ring. Some chucking around by the hair to start. “Right To Censor have an issue with Lita’s ring attire, specifically her exposed underwear,” says JR. “I hope we don’t get a shot up Ivory’s skirt, that would be disgusting,” says Lawler. Ivory is wrestling in a very long skirt and boots with a serious heel, not an outfit conducive to free movement. Lita’s eyebrow is busted open pretty badly. Ivory drops legs and elbows and gets a two. “The one thing she’s good for, she’s not good at,” Lawler says. He won’t expand on it when pushed by JR. That’s grim even by his standards. 

A headscissors from Lita is met with an eye rake. Stevie Richards comes down to the ring. Lita hits a crossbody to the outside on the nerds. She sells well as she goes up for a nice moonsault. Richards pulls Ivory away and the ref just tells him off a bit. Lita ducks a belt shot from Ivory, back suplex then up the ropes again. She whips her top off and the crowd goes wild. Ivory gets the knees up on the moonsault and that’s the rather limp finish. 

Verdict: this was hardly a great time for women’s wrestling but both went in pretty hard and Lita looked grizzled in defeat. *½ 

JR says a lot of women would have “folded their tent and got their nails done” if they were busted open like Lita. To give Lawler his due, he notes that a lot of blokes would too. 

Coach provides a boring update outside Rocky’s dressing room. Jericho attacks Kane. He swings a chair very hard at his head which Kane ducks. I appreciate the effort ensuring those who need it get protected on this show. 

Someone behind JR has a sign that says “PEDOPHILE” with an arrow pointing down. 

A package for Angle vs Undertaker. Angle is still basically a rookie at this point but he just gets it like few before or since. Undertaker isn’t sure exactly what his gimmick is. He’s a biker but he’s trying to get “deadman incorporated” over. That’s shit. He’s interviewed pre-match by Cole. He recites some badly scripted stuff. 

WWF Championship: Kurt Angle (c) vs Undertaker

Angle hits the ring for a promo. He asks for a moment of silence. He wants everyone to reflect on their favourite Kurt Angle moments from the past year. Unbelievable stuff. A year in, he’s a better talker than Undertaker would ever be. The Deadman scoots to the ring on his daffy bike. Angle scarpers and Taker hefts the belt around. Can you imagine how annoyed Undertaker would be if someone did that with his belt. 

Taker throws Angle a chair and the Olympian waffles the challenger before the bell rings. Undertaker’s not interested in selling a thing. He leg drops Kurt and pulls him up before the three. He does his stupid rope walk. Angle escapes the ring, then nips back in and catches Taker on the chase, stomping him. Big German suplex and a clothesline out of the ring for Undertaker, but Kurt’s axe handle off the apron is caught. Kurt is cracked into the post a few times. Back in the ring, Angle ducks a boot and goes after Undertaker’s knee. Eventually Taker grabs an arm bar because he’s wicked at MMA. Edge and Christian come to distract the ref while Angle taps out. Kurt fights out of a chokeslam and goes back to the knee. JR calls Angle “nerdy”. That’s fucking rich. Taker flips over the ropes like Kane and beats up E&C a bit. Back in, he gets another chokeslam and another visual win while the referee’s distracted. 

Angle rolls Taker up for a 2. Taker hits a Russian leg sweep, but Angle escapes outside and returns to the knee. Back in, Kurt locks  on the Figure Four. As always, it’s reversed. A tilt-a-whirl from Taker gets a 2, but Angle again grabs a leg and does the Bret Hart Figure Four around the ring post. Kurt hits a low blow. So many low blows on this show. Angle wriggles out of a Tombstone and scampers under the ring. Taker drags him out and hits a Last Ride. He covers, but the referee points out - that’s not Kurt! The real Kurt reappears and rolls up Undertaker to retain. 

Verdict: The amount they protect Undertaker is ridiculous but Kurt’s great fun. A lot of stuff around the knee to say the finish is just a goofy bait and switch. **½ 

Angle runs off into the night. It’ll transpire later that the guy who took the Last Ride is his brother. We get an advert for XFL, who are looking for cheerleaders. The gag is the voiceover guy gets distracted because they’re so fit. They’re all white. 

Traditional Survivor Series Match: Edge, Christian, Bull Buchanan & The Goodfather vs Hardyz & Dudleys

I love Edge & Christian’s annoying dickheads gimmick from this time. Matt and Jeff Hardy get a colossal pop. All you need to do is get rid of the Right To Censor boys and you’ve a classic match here. Bubba and Bull start us off as a “we want tables” chant immediately begins. Some heavy hits. D-Von enters and hits a nice spinning elbow. Bull tags Goodfather. Get the fun lads in please. Edge and Matt Hardy enter as the match breaks down. All four faces DDT all four heels. The Hardyz strip off their shirts to reveal Dudleyz camo beneath. Fun! Then those undershirts come off too. It’s fun to hear the ladies really pop for that. Val Venis, on the outside, distracts Matt. Edge hits the Edge-O-Matic or whatever for the three. D-Von hits a neckbreaker and clothesline on Edge, who tags his then-pretend-brother. Bull distracts D-Von and Christian hits the Impaler for the three. 

Bubba with a massive back drop on Christian. Jeff in to a pop but Christian knocks him around. JR says the Hardyz’ careers won’t last long - that’s a laugh! After Bull and Goodfather get a bit of stuff in, Edge accidentally spears Bull. He’s gone! In short order, Christian comes off the top and nails Edge, who’s pinned himself. It’s two on two. Goodfather saves Christian from an atomic drop and hits a death valley driver on Bubba. Just Jeff left. Jeff uses his speed against the lumbering former pimp, then hits a Swanton bomb on Christian for the three. Goodfather returns to chuck Jeff about a bit. He winds up the Ho Train but misses. Val gets involved again but accidentally clotheslines his pal, and Jeff’s won the day.

Verdict: It’s fun enough and doesn’t stick around too long. Everyone involved is at least a decent talent. **½ 

RTC are quick to stick the boot in after the match, but the Dudleyz and Matt make the safe. Surely this match would have made more sense were it RTC versus four good guys. We get some table spots. The crowd loves it so fair play. 

 A recap video reminds us again that Austin was run over and he’s livid about it. Triple H orchestrated the whole thing, I cannot remember why. 

Triple H vs Stone Cold Steve Austin

Triple H enters with his little bottle of water. He’s 6’4” ½ per JR. You don’t often hear about half an inch. The glass smashes. What a pop! They’re brawling from the off, that’s the third match that’s done this. Austin knocks HHH around until The Game jabs an eye and does some brawling of his own. A knee to the gut, then a Thesz press. Love that move. They spill to the outside for some Attitude Era walkin’ and punchin’. Austin bounces HHH off the barriers. He picks up a hefty bit of scaffolding but Triple H knocks it in Austin’s head. He chucks him into some flight cases. We’re off backstage! 

No, we’re not. Straight back to the stage. Austin with a running clothesline. He swaggers into the spotlight but eats a clothesline himself on the concrete. Both are selling this as a blood feud well. They stagger to the announcers’ tables. Austin clonks HHH with a monitor. Austin walks around a bit so Triple H can blade. He’s an underrated seller is Hunter, he’s good at looking fully out of it. Austin produces a beer cooler. He drinks several beers. He crushes a can with HHH’s head. He swears at Earl Hebner. Back in the ring, HHH gets the jump briefly, then hits yet another low blow. They’re soon back outside. Back in the ring, HHH goes for the first pin of the match. That’s a nice touch, it always annoys me when there are a load of pinfall attempts in a blood feud. Austin hits a spine buster. He shouts “fuck you” and misses an elbow drop. They’re outside again. With Stone Cold in control, a girl screams “kick his fuckin’ ass”. HHH sets up steps near a table and tries to go for a piledriver. It doesn’t look remotely like he’s going to do so, and unsurprisingly Austin reverses into a backdrop through the table. Back in the ring, Austin stomps a mudhole. He gets unusually good sound on his stomps. 

He goes to Pillmanise HHH’s leg. He takes the chair off the leg. The crowd boos until he wraps it around Helmsley’s neck instead. Yay! HHH rolls out before he can be murdered. They brawl up the ramp, onto the stage, and then to the back, where the Radicalz attack. Benoit gets some licks in on Austin and runs off. Steve gives chase while HHH lurks in a car in order to murder Stone Cold. The wily Texan commandeers a forklift, though. He lifts HHH’s car high in the sky and drops it upside down, presumably killing his colleague. The end. 

Verdict: I mean that’s a bit much, that finish, but it’s the best match on the card. They work super well together and Triple H’s status as a tough but cowardly heel is well honed. You don’t leave yourself with many places to go after that ending, mind. ***

Final verdict: Surprisingly bad show. No total shit but nothing above a three star match for me and an odd way of repeating things - several post-match beatdowns, several matches that just start with folks running in, loads of mule kicks/low blows. C-